Equal and Opposite Reactions

It's been nearly a week since I last blogged.  I have been on an extended 'trip' where time nor a computer were my friends.

I have awakened from a 3 hour nap where I truly believe if the house were ablaze, I would not have survived.  I am literally spent.  All three of my 'subjects' (no, not people) of this blog are so intertwined and intermingled that I
think I'll just throw it all in one big heap.

You've heard or used all these expressions yourself
yin/yang
calm before the storm
the valley before the peak
opposite ends of the spectrum
this too shall pass

All of these 'expressions' have happened during the last few days.  Bi-polar type ups and downs.  What began as a quick trip to look into selling art to textiles and/or print companies ended up being a marathon on my body, mind, soul and art.

I feel like I'm watching my heart/soul split in front of me and I can't stitch it together fast enough.  One side is ecstatic, the other is hurting horribly.  And all at the same time within hours of each other.  Is this what I get for wanting to be a more practiced, contemplative person?  Hmm?

Well here goes.  Hope you don't throw up from the ride.

Did some excellent research at ADAC.  Don't ask me what the E-I-E-I-O means.  It's changed and frankly, I don't care.  But the gist is that it is a haven for 'design professionals', non-professionals are not allowed in the building.   I think they are afraid you might actually decorate or design something yourself! EEEK!

Downside:  Forgot my driver's license so had to pull strings to get in,  MAJOR problem!!! (my string is my professional  husband).  Marital perk there.

Upside:  I sat not 3 feet away from Greg Norman during a quick bowl of soup in the cafe before running into him in one of the textile places.  Sorry. No Chrissy to be seen.  But he is a handsome man.

Downside:  One of the resources I was REALLY wanting to see has since closed.

Upside:  Excellent research and a new prospective relationship with outdoor furniture textiles.

Next I went to the Gift Mart to talk to the people that buy your art work to sell to people like Pottery Barn and Target.

Upside:  Not sure there was one.  I haven't been aware of so much tacky crap that people obviously not only produce but buy since I was a buyer for my gift store 13 years ago.  FUGLY stuff.  I mean, you wouldn't re-gift this to Goodwill, kind of stuff.  And people were standing there with their pens out ordering it.....I nearly ran but thought better of it. I would forget where I parked my car.

Downside:  The 'people' left a day earlier. Either they were so impressed they left  early or they were so DEpressed they left early.  All I could do was laugh.

Upside:  I have a contact in my backyard who went there to buy artwork. I'm going directly to him this time.

After this extraordinarily frustrating day, I came home to find a HUGE UPSIDE!!!!  It appears my art will be the featured art a Symphony fundraiser in Columbus, GA this May.  I asked Kate, who lives in Columbus and is heading this event, if they would think we were gay if I kissed her and her reply was "Of course. We're in Columbus"  HA!  Very very very big high.

But of course I had to go to bed that night realizing that the next day not only was one of my oldest friends having her surgery that could possibly tell her she has cancer (she is my age) but my best friend was having to go to court regarding her divorce.  Both things were awful.  Standing there waiting for the train to hit both of my friends with not a thing in the world I could/can do for either.  Helplessness is not one of my favorite feelings.  I abhor it.

I didn't get one minute's sleep.  Tossed and turned, flipped and flopped, much like my emotions.  We awoke before the sun came up, which I usually say is "before God is awake".  Can you tell I am NOT a morning person?

Side note.  I love Thai food. I used to cook it so much that my husband begged me to finally stop.  Sort of like the Bob Marley CD I played when we first dated.  Anyway, so to spoil myself,  I had Thai food two nights in a row.  Heavenly Thai food.  And yes this is on the eve of court.   And no, of course I did not even take into consideration what my body would do with all that spice with stress thrown in there.  Now I know why the Thai people are so skinny.  The food doesn't have a CHANCE to be absorbed into  your body!  I realized this on the WAY to court.  Nothing like a little more stress.

So I spend the day on a hard bench, surrounding by people with hard hearts making hard decisions.  My friend being one of them.  Beautiful, funny, brilliant and reduced to bickering for 3 solid hours over $500 a month.  Her soon to be ex's attorney, let's call him Napolean, puffing around and making odd faces but I don't think I heard a coherent sentence out of his mouth in 8 hours.  I have never contemplating wearing orange more.  (Orange is the color of jumpsuit Tennessee has for it's inmates, just in case you didn't get that. I didn't mean I wanted to be a UT fan).

All the while I can't get to a phone to find out about my other friend's surgery and I get a text that my red head is sick.  Are  you with me now on these pendulum swings?

After  many tears, much anger and then getting the joy of listening to one of the most pathetic excuses of a human being address the court about why he didn't need a restraining order (even though we heard lovely tapes of him threatening to kill his wife and he is a retired police officer), we got to do our diddy and leave.  Shew. I needed a fire hose to clean off all the bad feelings that were sticking to me.  That and the three parking tickets I had waving to me on my marshmallow.  Just waving.  "Hi, Stacey". "Nope. You're not finished yet".  That's when I decided we should go to the Ritz Carlton in Buckhead and drink a glass of champagne.  BRILLIANT idea, if I do say so myself.

That's just what we did.  I love the Ritz Carlton.  I've stayed there twice in my life.  One of the best times ever in my life was with my Mother. That's another story.  A hilarious one.  But this was just a tiny layover in the cushy sofa's with the soft light, beautiful chandeliers and perfectly chilled champagne and kind people to smile and serve us.  We had missed high tea, so it was perfect for the 5 o'clock cocktail hour.

It really changed our moods.  That and two glasses of champagne with only rice for lunch.  But who cares! We were able to step away from all that ugliness into a world of beauty.  We were able to laugh too.  And then the funniest, kindest two older Irishmen sat down and we had a delightful conversation.  They were so happy!  Their day had started at 6 am too, but in a jet flying to Chicago and back.  It was one of the gentlemen's birthday's.  THEY were having a ball that day.   And they were as good of friends to each other as we were.

We talked about travel, what in the world they were doing in Atlanta, how long they had been friends, their race cars (yes, they race cars), anything to keep the happy bubble from bursting.  It surrounded us with warmth and happiness and we went home with smiles on our faces.  I slept like a rock then awoke again before God and drove home.  I took a picture of the sunrise (blood orange red), listened to David Gray  (Shine) , Ben Harper (With My Own Two Hands), and any one else I could get my hands on that was uplifting.  Thank God for people who sing their souls out.  What a powerful gift. I am grateful.

When I parked my car in the driveway my redhead came outside (freezing arse cold) to get some loving. Doesn't get much better than that.  But it did!  My husband had cleaned the entire house down to the last load of laundry.

Maybe that's why a heart beat looks the way it does; spikes of up and down.  It just can't hold it all in at the same time.

Enjoy the lyrics to Ben's song.

I can change the world 
With my own two hands 
Make a better place 
With my own two hands 
Make a kinder place 
With my own two hands 
With my own 
With my own two hands 
I can make peace on earth 
With my own two hands 
I can clean up the earth 
With my own two hands 
I can reach out to you 
With my own two hands 
With my own 
With my own two hands 
I'm gonna make it a brighter place 
I'm gonna make it a safer place 
I'm gonna help the human race 
With my own 
With my own two hands 
I can hold you 
With my own two hands 
I can comfort you 
With my own two hands 
But you got to use 
Use your own two hands 
Use your own 
Use your own two hands 
With our own 
With our own two hands 
With my own 
With my own two hand